living slow

I am learning how to cook dinner for one person again.
Sometimes when I am cooking I get really sad, and that empty feeling creeps inside my chest. It has become very, very real that you are no longer with me.
I want to call you and tell you how much I miss your companionship. I don't miss the problems we had, but I sure do miss laughing with you. You were my best friend, you really were.
My roommates (who are very sweet) took me on a little tour of San Luis Obispo yesterday. We explored Pirate's Cove (a nudist beach), watched the sun set over Avila, and took a little tour of the Madonna Inn (a famous hotel in the area with really gaudy, themed rooms). I am excited for all of the new adventures I'm going to have in my new home.
I'm really good at being alone, and I feel like I have already grown. But I also really enjoy being in a relationship. I'm in that weird space where I miss certain parts of being in one but I am nowhere near being ready to start another one.
I have a lot to learn. I started journaling again, and picked up my guitar. The weather here is cloudy and cold, and this morning I went to the beach with the kid I nanny for. I really am so lucky to be here.